Hooray! It’s time for another Wifey Wednesday post!!
I promised, from the beginning (all 3 posts ago – ha ha ha), I would share my successes and my failures with you and today, I keep that promise.
This was a rough week. Not an epic fail, but a fail none-the-less
I was encouraged by my pin Speak Your Approval from Kaylene Yoder (apparently I’m hooked on this gal’s stuff. 😉 ) to pay attention to how I speak to my Mr Right.
I’m encouraging. I can motivate you like no one’s business, unless you’re my hubs.
Then, I suck!
I’m not sure I wanted to admit this to myself. I think I’ve known for some time but couldn’t or wouldn’t admit it to myself.
I can pick my man apart in a millisecond.
“Why do I always have to….”
“Could you be….”
“Why don’t you ever…”
If it’s something I don’t like and he’s doing it, I’m on him like white on rice.
Sad, but true. 😦
I’m uplifting to most folks around me, but poor Mr. Right gets the worst parts of me I can find. Not intentionally, I don’t believe, but it’s true. He is not getting the me I show others.
In her post,Kaylene talks about the following 4 encouragement phrases to speak to your husband:
Um, yeah, these rarely come out of my mouth; might occasionally make it in a text; are not some of my go to’s.
Although all four ARE TRUE for me.
I KNOW together, everything will be OK
I SEE how incredibly hard he works to provide for our family
I KNOW he loves me and I REALLY love him
I’m extremely PROUD of him…EXTREMELY
Now if only I could get those things out of my head into his!!
I’ve pondered this all week. Did you notice the phrases I used above?
YEP! All of them were about ME! I feel an ah ha moment coming on, don’t you?
It’s one thing to THINK encouraging words, but an entirely different thing to actually CONVEY them.
Tweet: It’s one thing to THINK encouraging words, but an entirely different thing to actually CONVEY them.
I can think it, know it and see it all day long, but unless I’m conveying it, Mr Right isn’t going to get what he needs. (um, that’s right ladies and gentlemen, Mr Right is good, but he IS NOT a mind reader…although that could be helpful at times 😉 )
I’ve come up with my own versions of words of approval (I have to give a big THANKS to Kaylene Yoder for the jumping off points on her post!!) I even liked the way she presented her phrases and have fashioned mine in the same format. Copying is the highest form of flattery (hope she takes it that way if she sees my post here! 🙂
#1 I’m on Your Side – When things aren’t looking up and I know Mr Right is feeling overwhelmed or alone, I need to be letting him know I’m on his side and we are a team. Going through all of life, good and bad, together. I think this is a phrase my man would be glad to hear.
#2 You’re a Great Provider – Again, thinking about my Mr Right specifically, this is a phrase I know he would respond to. I think most men want to be good providers, I would venture to guess they base who they are and their self esteem on their ability to provide
#3 You’re Love is a Blessing – Letting Mr. Right know he’s doing a good job of loving me should be a priority. I am truly a blessed woman and letting my man know I am blessed to call him husband can only make him feel good about us and our relationship. He doesn’t always get things right but he ALWAYS loves me and I need him to know how much of a blessing that is.
#4 I’m Proud of _______ – I know telling Mr Right I am proud of him would be too much of a blanket statement, too vague. He needs concrete things I am proud of him for. So, I changed I’m proud of you to be more specific. For example: I’m proud of your work ethic. I’m proud of your relationship with God, I’m proud of the way you care for us., etc.
Let’s face it, guys need encouragement just like us gals, albeit perhaps in different ways. Our men need us to let them know they are a blessing, they are loving us well, they are good providers and that we are on their side.
Let’s get it out of our heads, into our mouths, and into their heads!
Speak Life into Your Marriage!!
How do you speak encouragement to your hubby?
Till Next Time,